Here is a continuation of Part 1 on Spiritual Abuse.
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The authors, Johnson and Van Vonderen, have identified seven (7) of the most common characteristics of the truly abusive system. These characteristics are certain unhealthy dynamics that dictate how people function within spiritual abusive systems.
Spiritual abuse is not so readily recognizable to prevent it from occurring in any denomination, any church, or any para-church organization. In fact, even if individuals in a religious group observed spiritual abuse, most would choose to ignore it for any number of reasons.
1. Power-Posturing
The authors point out that the first characteristic of an abusive religious system is power-posturing. Power-posturing simply means that leaders spend a lot of time focused on their own authority and reminding others of it, as well.
Those who are true leaders demonstrate authority, spiritual power, and credibility by their lives and message. God gives authority, and He does so in the body of Christ to build them, serve them, equip them, and set them free to do God’s agenda – which may or may not coincide with the agenda of the leadership. Matthew 10:1 says, “And having summoned His twelve disciples, He gave them authority.”
Leaders to whom God has given authority shepherd the flock and in so doing, set people free. Yet leaders without genuine spiritual authority from God spend a lot of energy posturing about how much authority they have and how much everyone else is supposed to submit to it. The fact that they are eager to place people under them – under their word, under their “authority” – is one easy-to-spot clue that they are operating in their own authority.
2. Performance Preoccupation
In abusive religious systems, leaders are preoccupied with the performance of their members. Obedience and submission are two important words in these systems. Spiritually abusive systems do not foster holiness or obedience to God; they merely accommodate a leader’s distorted interpretation of spirituality and their need for control. In the larger context of spiritual leadership, you will see that it is only appropriate to obey and submit to leadership when their authority is from God and their spirit is consistent with His.
3. Unspoken Rules
Unspoken rules are those that govern unhealthy denominations, churches, other religious organizations, and families, but are not said out loud. Because they are not said out loud, you don’t find out that they are there until you break them. In this setting, if an individual disagrees with the leader, they will never again be trusted and loyalty becomes suspect. Rules like this remain unspoken because examining them in the light of mature dialogue would instantly reveal how illogical, unhealthy, and anti-Christian they are. So silence becomes the fortress wall of protection, shielding the leader’s power position from scrutiny or challenge.
The authors point out that “when you find unspoken rules by breaking them unintentionally, you will then suffer one of two consequences: either neglect (being ignored, overlooked, shunned) or aggressive legalism (questioned, openly censured, asked to leave)…”
In the conservative evangelical church, the spoken word is, “the Bible is the written authority.” In the same denomination, church, or family there may also be an unwritten rule that says, “It is better to be nice than to be honest.” The written rule, the Bible, says in Ephesians 4:25, “Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth, each one of you, with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.”
In this context, now we have a conflict. The written rule says one thing, the unwritten rule another. The question is asked, “If you came from a system where both rules were in operation, which rule won most often? Was honesty suppressed, repressed, or even oppressed? In spiritually abusive groups, even though leaders may insist they stand upon the authority of Scripture, you will not always find Scripture to be considered by those leaders as powerful as the unwritten rules.
The most powerful of all unspoken rules in the abusive system is the “can’t talk” rule. The thinking goes like this, “The real problem cannot be exposed because then it would have to be dealt with and things would have to change; so it must be protected behind walls of silence or by legalistic assault. And if you speak about the problem out loud, you are the problem. Of course, the presupposition for talking about the problem out loud is that the one talking tells the truth and has a genuine concern for the “body” that supersedes personal, ambitious, self-serving goals.
In spiritually abusive systems, there exists a “pretend peace”— the kind mentioned by Jeremiah when he decried, saying, “The prophets say ‘peace, peace’ when there is none.” If what unites us is our pretending to agree, even though we don’t agree, then we have nothing more than pretend peace…, with undercurrents of tension and backbiting.”
The “can’t talk” rule blames the person who talks, and the ensuing punishments pressure questioners into silence. On the other hand, when God’s Spirit draws us together, it is possible to disagree and yet not destroy the sense of God’s presence in our midst, the cooperation of working side by side for the sake of God’s Kingdom, and our very heartbeat for spanning the globe with our witness that “Jesus saves!”
http://www.morrischapman.com/article.asp?id=39
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The next post will contain the final four characteristics of spiritual abuse identified in the book entitled, The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse written by Johnson and Van Vonderen and published in 1991 by Bethany House Publishers.
Spiritual abuse is not so readily recognizable to prevent it from occurring in any denomination, any church, or any para-church organization. In fact, even if individuals in a religious group observed spiritual abuse, most would choose to ignore it for any number of reasons.
1. Power-Posturing
The authors point out that the first characteristic of an abusive religious system is power-posturing. Power-posturing simply means that leaders spend a lot of time focused on their own authority and reminding others of it, as well.
Those who are true leaders demonstrate authority, spiritual power, and credibility by their lives and message. God gives authority, and He does so in the body of Christ to build them, serve them, equip them, and set them free to do God’s agenda – which may or may not coincide with the agenda of the leadership. Matthew 10:1 says, “And having summoned His twelve disciples, He gave them authority.”
Leaders to whom God has given authority shepherd the flock and in so doing, set people free. Yet leaders without genuine spiritual authority from God spend a lot of energy posturing about how much authority they have and how much everyone else is supposed to submit to it. The fact that they are eager to place people under them – under their word, under their “authority” – is one easy-to-spot clue that they are operating in their own authority.
2. Performance Preoccupation
In abusive religious systems, leaders are preoccupied with the performance of their members. Obedience and submission are two important words in these systems. Spiritually abusive systems do not foster holiness or obedience to God; they merely accommodate a leader’s distorted interpretation of spirituality and their need for control. In the larger context of spiritual leadership, you will see that it is only appropriate to obey and submit to leadership when their authority is from God and their spirit is consistent with His.
3. Unspoken Rules
Unspoken rules are those that govern unhealthy denominations, churches, other religious organizations, and families, but are not said out loud. Because they are not said out loud, you don’t find out that they are there until you break them. In this setting, if an individual disagrees with the leader, they will never again be trusted and loyalty becomes suspect. Rules like this remain unspoken because examining them in the light of mature dialogue would instantly reveal how illogical, unhealthy, and anti-Christian they are. So silence becomes the fortress wall of protection, shielding the leader’s power position from scrutiny or challenge.
The authors point out that “when you find unspoken rules by breaking them unintentionally, you will then suffer one of two consequences: either neglect (being ignored, overlooked, shunned) or aggressive legalism (questioned, openly censured, asked to leave)…”
In the conservative evangelical church, the spoken word is, “the Bible is the written authority.” In the same denomination, church, or family there may also be an unwritten rule that says, “It is better to be nice than to be honest.” The written rule, the Bible, says in Ephesians 4:25, “Therefore, laying aside falsehood, speak truth, each one of you, with his neighbor, for we are members of one another.”
In this context, now we have a conflict. The written rule says one thing, the unwritten rule another. The question is asked, “If you came from a system where both rules were in operation, which rule won most often? Was honesty suppressed, repressed, or even oppressed? In spiritually abusive groups, even though leaders may insist they stand upon the authority of Scripture, you will not always find Scripture to be considered by those leaders as powerful as the unwritten rules.
The most powerful of all unspoken rules in the abusive system is the “can’t talk” rule. The thinking goes like this, “The real problem cannot be exposed because then it would have to be dealt with and things would have to change; so it must be protected behind walls of silence or by legalistic assault. And if you speak about the problem out loud, you are the problem. Of course, the presupposition for talking about the problem out loud is that the one talking tells the truth and has a genuine concern for the “body” that supersedes personal, ambitious, self-serving goals.
In spiritually abusive systems, there exists a “pretend peace”— the kind mentioned by Jeremiah when he decried, saying, “The prophets say ‘peace, peace’ when there is none.” If what unites us is our pretending to agree, even though we don’t agree, then we have nothing more than pretend peace…, with undercurrents of tension and backbiting.”
The “can’t talk” rule blames the person who talks, and the ensuing punishments pressure questioners into silence. On the other hand, when God’s Spirit draws us together, it is possible to disagree and yet not destroy the sense of God’s presence in our midst, the cooperation of working side by side for the sake of God’s Kingdom, and our very heartbeat for spanning the globe with our witness that “Jesus saves!”
http://www.morrischapman.com/article.asp?id=39
---------------------------------------------------
The next post will contain the final four characteristics of spiritual abuse identified in the book entitled, The Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse written by Johnson and Van Vonderen and published in 1991 by Bethany House Publishers.
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